dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
If you don't get head tonight I will castrate you
Seriously. Castrate.
Friendly reminder that on the walk home you tripped but instead of falling to the sidewalk, you tried to save it and ended up headbutting my ex-boyfriend in the balls. ILU.
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
After 3 parties, all of them busted, and 4 field sobriety tests, I AM the cop whisperer
Randomize
