How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
Turned the water balloon filler into a jungle juice fire extinguisher. Please call me tomorrow afternoon and make sure that i'm still alive.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
I was dressed in monkey onesie serving people vodka jelly with a spoon...
Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
Randomize
