We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
Randomize
