normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
YOU NEED TO STOP BLOWING DUDES ON MY COUCH AT MY PARTIES
YOU NEED TO STOP PROVIDING TEQUILA AT YOUR PARTIES
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
Everytime I get drunk I wake up hugging the bag of bagels from three months ago
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
I told her I'd rather set my hair on fire than sleep with her again. In retrospect, that was probably too harsh. My eye is still swollen shut.
Randomize
