Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
I'm sorry I drunk dialed you before realizing that you were already in bed with me.
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
Randomize
