So I have exactly 420 dollars saved up in tips from the past week. I win, and I take that as a sign from god that I am allowed to use that money to buy drugs.
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
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