just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
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