whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
Puked in a plastic neiman Marcus bag while driving. My biggest accomplishment yet
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
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