Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
After you bought Jesus' name tag off him at the Mexican restaurant you commenced to stumbling around the lobby showing anybody who would listen what would Jesus do.
Stop giving me tequila.
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
literally just tried sending to someone a video of me jerkin but my phone was connected to Apple TV and it literally just played on the tv in a full room and I'm actually about to shit myself
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
