Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
90% sure I just opened a snapchat of you in a fuzzy bathrobe next to your ceiling collapsing
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
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