PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
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