This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
To celebrate your birthday last night, I got drunk and sang drift away in buffalo wild wings. Happy birthday. The entire bar sang the chorus with me. It was magical.
Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
Randomize
