Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
I wish we could go back in time and find our best farts ever
this morning my mom told me to get a new vibrator because mine was too loud last night
i fell asleep watchin iron chef that was the blender she heard. i dont even own a vibrator
My mom is making me buy a single zucchini, I look like someone who can't afford a dildo
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
If I can't pick up a cat lady, I probably need to turn to Internet dating.
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
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