I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
Randomize