Your tits are I can't wait for
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
She said she couldn't find my penis because my arm was in the way. That was my penis
Every man deserves at least one moment like that
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
You gave me a bottle of tequila and introduced me to a ginger named cowboy. I actually love you.
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
Randomize
