Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
filled out health questionnaire for lower premiums a little bit too honestly. Literally got assigned a life coach.
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
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