you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
I just threw up while getting a haircut. I'm never trying to accomplish stuff with a hangover again.
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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