My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
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