Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
His 21st birthday is in the middle of shark week, it's meant to be.
You know being hammered seven days in a row can do serious damage to your liver.
Text me on Monday and make sure I'm still alive
Awkwardly walking by your fuck buddy and waving a casual hi in his direction like nothing has happened is probably the best thing in my life
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
Dear god my vagina.
Randomize
