i think my mom watched the whole time
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
just woke up to a get well card i wrote myself when i was drunk. it was by the advil. i am a cocky bitch.
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
I need a burrito and a hug.
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
Randomize
