well most of my day revolves around power hour
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
I got the shit slapped outta me last night but the pain in my jaw doesn’t even compare to the hangover I have.
Randomize
