so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
Hey. Hope youre not too hungover. Also, did you put a Christmas tree in my guest bathroom and cover it with condoms?
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
His 21st birthday is in the middle of shark week, it's meant to be.
You know being hammered seven days in a row can do serious damage to your liver.
Text me on Monday and make sure I'm still alive
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
You know what a wolf looks like when it kills a small animal? How it shakes it around in it's mouth? I did that to a bag of Taco Bell last night
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
Randomize
