Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
Randomize
