White coat. Heels.
two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
I just changed her number in my phone to "You Wouldn't If You were Sober"
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
Swear to god, somebody just drove by with mickey mouse in their passenger seat and he waved at me.
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
Randomize
