i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
Better skin, bigger boobs.. Birth control is INCREASING my chance of getting pregnant because people actually want to have sex with me now.
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
Why didn't you ever bring me to the pope as a baby so he could kiss me.
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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