watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
Does your Fitbit monitor your liver failure?
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
Randomize
