I was in the bathroom and her cat just looked at my penis with a profound hatred.
i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
Getting day drunk before work is perfectly acceptable when its 99 cent margaritas.
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
I couldn't find a water bottle, so I sent her to school with her juice in a flask. Who the hell let me become a parent?
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
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