She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
God doesn't care if you're a paramedic, you can't do that to someones cat and still get into heaven
Randomize
