I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
I was speaking french the whole night. Until i got arrested. Then I decided I should probably start speaking English.
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
Pretty sure I left lotion and my bra in your car. I've secured your fathers belief that your straight. You can thank me later
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
Well the nurse forgot to take all my stitches out, so my surgical tools are peroxide, kitchen scissors, fingernail clippers, a pocket knife, and 11 beers. Let's do this...
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
Randomize
