Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
I woke up this morning to find my closet lacking 98% of my clothes and a text from my male roommate saying your dresses squeeze my genitals
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
Randomize