super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
Do you remember that time on the drunk bus when I kept thanking the bus driver for serving our country?
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
turns out my ex girlfriend has become my most successful wingman. life is fuckin weird sometimes
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
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