I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
PSA: Morning booty calls are no longer accepted after the hours of 6am when I've been drinking or before 11am when I have not. Your cooperation is appreciated.
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
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