if you like me you must not know who I am
hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
Randomize
