Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
Paying 5 grand for boobs is saving me like 10 grand in weed
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
Omg. I'm living macklemores best life. I have someone's granddads dog, I'm about to have someone's grandmas car. I look incredible.
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
Randomize