What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
you can officially check off peeing off the 5th floor while shouting "I want to break the guinness world record for longest piss stream" off your college to do list.
You made out with my dog and told me he tasted like a rainbow.
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel.
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
i told her i loved her afterwards and she said "i know," kissed me, and got up to start making breakfast.
dude, she han solo'd you. keep her.
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
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