apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
Facebook lets you pick usernames now. You'd better log on and get yours before homewreckingwhore is taken...
I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative.
That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame.
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
I'm making myself a nametag with my contact info and pinning it to myself like a kindergardenter in case I get lost when I black out on Sat.
Can we laminate it? Just to be safe.
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
i woke up half naked on someone's pool lounge chair in a house that i don't know, with someone's phone number scrawled on my stomach. why do i hang out with you again??
You just listed two reasons.
Randomize
