So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
Dude, I just rear-ended a cab
Are you drunk?
A little...yes
Run!
Terrible brother advice.
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
Should I put the spider I likely swallowed in my sleep into my calorie tracker?
Randomize
