sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
If you're still awake, how rude would it be if I masturbated in her new apartment on moving day? If you're asleep, then ask me how it was.
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
Randomize