So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
During sex he started singing that song in Forgetting Sarah Marshall--"Inside of You"--by Russell Brand
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
how do flat chested girls get laid?
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
I woke up with my face covered in mustard. Your mom said I ate hotdogs like a pornstar
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
Randomize
