well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
He raised his arm and dropped it in his sleep to smack himself awake. He knows his phone has an alarm clock right?
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
My life has turned into sitting in the driveway listening to Total Eclipse of the Heart while staring at the Blue Moon. Hey, August. Let's be nice. I need help.
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
Randomize
