How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
Randomize
