real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
Just so we're clear. I'm still making jello shots and bringing them to the bar in my purse. I don't care if its half off margaritas. Don't want anyone thirsty
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
I just took what could be the most awkward shit in my life, which considering my definition of awkward and my experiences shitting, is pretty fucking awkward.
...
I was sitting there doing my business and the guy in the stall next to me banged on the stall and asked me how to spell picnic because he wasn't sure.
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
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