i was high and broke so i stole a roast chicken and a 40 inch sheet cake from wegmans and ate in a bathroom stall.
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
my little sister told my dad she found willy wonka's golden ticket in the backseat of my car. now my dad knows my boyfriend uses magnums.
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
Anderson Cooper just came out.
Crying tears of glitter and rainbows right now. Gonna decorate my dildo like My Little Pony in his honor.
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
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