I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
What drink are we having for lunch?
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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