who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
It's hard to judge what a reasonable amount of cereal looks like in the spaghetti pot. We're out of cap'n crunch and milk.
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
Randomize
