I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
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