I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
She asked to borrow my chapstick then said "I promise I won't get herpes on it"
I'm pretty sure she sent a group text out saying that I was the one to get with her last night and sorry to everyone who didnt make it.
Honestly it was an honor just to be nominated.
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
Randomize
