I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
Just bought myself a coach diaper bag. I thought it would be perfect for school. the baby bottle holders are where i'm gonna put my booze
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
Randomize