this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
I said ACK before Andy Samberg made it even remotely funny. That tool is stealing all my lines.
Yeah, you've definitely been jizzing in your pants years before he made it socially acceptable
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
17 year olds will be the death of me.
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
