she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
I'm sorry. But when a stripper driving a Bentley tells me I have potential..... I gotta at least listen to her proposal. God did not mean for me to waste these tits on law school.
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
I have this theory that your highest awareness of how drunk you are is while you're sitting on a toilet
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
Randomize
